Being smart in general doesn’t have a lot to do with being smart with women. I say this because I’ve seen some very smart guys do some very dumb sh*t with women, over and over again. So don’t take anything in this post personally; a lot of great and intelligent men happen to be among the dumbest with the opposite sex.
We’ve all made big mistakes with women, but some guys don’t learn and they keep making a mess of their love life. The big mistake I see the most is men settling down with prostitutes – that is a very bad move to make in life. I’ve gone over why that is a million times, like HERE. The good news is that more guys understand this these days. Sites like mine have beginners fairly well guarded against the onslaught of bad paths you can take, at least compared to their yesteryear counterparts. But like a bad virus, the sickness of settling down with prostitutes keeps adapting and evolving. Guys know better than to try and make an honest woman out of an obvious prostitute, but they’re totally willing to be with a girl who is clearly lying about not being one.
I get emails from guys who are having issues with their gf’s, and when they tell me their back story it’s so clear the girl was a hooker, yet they refuse to see it or believe it. Guys, please stop this madness! It’s not hard to tell, and like questionable milk: when in doubt, throw it out. The rule of thumb is, “ She’s essentially a prostitute until she proves otherwise.” That goes for girls you meet online, at clubs, in villages, at 7-11, all of them! They’re all prostitutes until they prove beyond any reasonable doubt that they’re not. There’s just too many examples of men finding out the girl they love used to be a whore after the fact; you just can’t gamble like that. Don’t get invested emotionally or financially with a girl until you are 100% sure. And if you don’t want to put the effort into finding out, you’re pretty much just accepting it either way.
Please don’t misunderstand me; this is nothing like an “all Thai girls are whores” sentiment. Not at all! As I’ve stated on the site before, only 3-5% of Thai women are or have been in the profession. The problem is that most of the “good girls,” who would be disgusted by the very thought of f’ing for $, aren’t going out of their way to meet Western men. And a lot (maybe half) of the girls who are trying to do whatever it takes to meet Western men have worked in the industry. So unless you go fishing in towns that don’t offer tourists much, you’re probably fishing in a tainted pond. IF you ignore this because, “this girl just doesn’t seem like the type,” you’re playing with fire and are suffering from some type of temporary insanity, otherwise known as infatuation. Half of the bar girls don’t seem like the type! And the college girls who just hooked for some quick cash for a year or two; it’s really not easy to uncover that type ofpast behavior, but it’s certainly possible.
Here is a working list of signs that should tell you there may be an issue. Individually many of them wouldn’t scare you, but when you combine a bunch, red flags should go off:
1) IS she poor? Lots of poor girls out there who wouldn’t hook, but a very small % of girls from middle class or wealthy families would ever do it. IF the girl’s family has money you’re in the clear for the most part. If not it only means that the opportunity was more tempting.
2) Does she have a baby who doesn’t live with her? Dead giveaway 90% of the time.
3) Is she friends with any girls who are obviously bar girls? Not a good sign if she is, and if she has multiple friends from the industry, forget it.
4) Did she ever work at bars, GoGo’s, or massage parlors? I know this seems obvious and I shouldn’t even need to put it on the list, but I have heard from a 100 or so guys that gave me a line like, “she used to be a hostess at a GoGo, but she would never ever go with a customer.” Total Horse sh*t. The girls like that justify the times they’ve hooked because they “only f’d customer they liked.” Don’t fall for that stupid nonsense.
5) Does she have a scattered work history of jobs that were only in major tourist cities like Pattaya? Not a great sign. If the girl ever lived in Pattaya, you’d really need to go out of your way to see proof that she had a legitimate job, and that still doesn’t mean she didn’t moonlight.
6) Did she take classes after graduating high school? IF she went to college, there is a much lower chance that she hooked. Again, she could have hooked on the side while in school, but only a small % of girls actually do that. More likely, if she went to college for a handful of years, that bodes well, since college years are the most common entry age for girls in the industry.
7) Does she get a bunch of phone calls when she’s with you that she ignores? This isn’t good, but could just mean that she has another boyfriend, which still isn’t good! I know you’ll get fed a line like, “I just enjoying being with you now and don’t want to talk my friends.” Guess what, my real monogamous gf’s that I’ve had in Thailand have never once sparred me of answering their phone in the name of “I just enjoying being with you.” They pick up their phone EVERY SINGLE TIME because they have no reason not to and because they’re not exactly dinner polite.
8) The usual signs of: tattoos, talk of past drug use, cigarette smoking, drinking tolerance, white guy friends, etc., they’re not individually all telling, but more than a couple and a picture starts getting painted for you.
9) Does she speak a very passable form of broken English that was pretty clearly not learned in school? It’s not hard to tell this, and it either means they had an English speaking boyfriend for a while, or they hooked, or both ,most of the time.
10) What’s her job history look like? Does it make any sense? A hooker who is lying about being a hooker will throw out lies upon lies, including what they’ve actually done to make money in the past. The thing is, their lies aren’t well thought out and they’re usually easy to identify. Ask her about these jobs she had in a way that someone could ask you about jobs you had where you’d easily be able to answer without flinching. Where was the office? How many people were in the office? Are you still friends with any of those people? Who was the owner? What was a typical day like? You can get away with asking these questions by insisting that you’re just acting curious about her skills and work experience. You’ll know if she’s lying by the way she responds to the questions.
11) Does she send her parents money every month? If so, how much? Many Thai women send money to their parents, but prostitutes send much more than the average Thai girl. So if she’s entrapped to send 10,000 baht per month to her family, when her job probably only paid her that amount in total, you have to figure she used to make a lot more than the average Thai girl? Why? How? This one rears it’s ugly head after it’s too late sometimes. Guys get asked to take over the “money I used to send my parents from my job.” Lies are either told or exposed at that point. I know regular chicks with low paying jobs and they try to send 2,000 baht per month to their parents; keep that in mind.
12) Has she ever been to Singapore? It’s not the end all be all, but a lot of girls know that they can make $ hooking in Singapore if they can get out there somehow.
13) Was she overly comfortable with you when you first got together? Assuming you’re not some kind of epic womanizer, you should expect that good Thai girls will be shy and anxious around you for a while. Girls who were in the pay for play profession lose that over time.
14) IS she fully shaved? This isn’t something a Thai girl would do for their Thai boyfriends. It doesn’t mean a lot either way, but it’s just another thing to say “hmmmn” about.
15) Does she seem like a pro when it comes to condoms, lube, and general bedroom behavior? This doesn’t mean that they’re going to act like a porn star, most bg’s never act like that. But a girl who has only had sex with a few guys in her life is going to act very different the first couple of times with you than a former hooker would. No joke, I once called a self proclaimed “good girl” out because of the way she gave me a hand job. I had only been out with her a few times and I pretty much knew she was lying the whole time anyway. But after the way she used her hand on me I asked her which massage parlor she worked at before. She was shocked and embarrassed, but I told her I didn’t care and was never going to be her bf anyway, so she confessed and felt better about it. Good girls don’t know how to use the upside down hand flip move in case you were wondering.
16) What’s her clothing like? This is usually a dead giveaway as well. Some of these girls don’t have the funds to remove all of their hooker-wear from their wardrobe. Cheap and insanely slutty dresses won’t be found in a good girl’s closet; and that’ll be the most common article of clothing found in a pro’s closet. Even down to the underwear, this is really one of the easiest ways for me to see if there is an issue. Most good girls are so conservative; like granny panty conservative. There are some girls who are more hip to Western styles and trends, but that is also a far cry from hooker-gear.
17) Does she spend like an asshole? Remember that a girl who has truly never made more than 10,000 baht per month is going to be a very careful spender. A girl who acts like money doesn’t matter must think it’s really easy to find it in lump sums.
18) What kind of bling and tech gear does she have? Thai hookers are pro’s at getting guys to buy them expensive (usually second hand) phones and gold. Remember that most hookers wind up having mini-relationships with some of their customers. In those cases they almost always get gifts. They can get gifts from their parents or from Thai boyfriends too, but not with any type of consistency.
19) How willing is she to engage in a threesome? Shy and good girls in Thailand are not going to go for this unless they think they absolutely have to, and if that’s the case they will clearly not be into it at all. Girls who just jump right in with another girl must have learned the behavior somehow. There aren’t any hard and fast rules about this, and some good girls might just happen to have a thing for girls. But even then they’d be nervous as hell if it was their first threesome. As great as having a threesome is, some things are too good to be true.
20) Is she possessive, jealous, and paranoid with you? The kind of Thai girls you should be looking for will basically let you do what you want and just hope that you don’t cheat a lot or ever get a girlfriend on the side. They’ll also have no problem believing you and they’ll be happy to. But a girl who was in the pay for play scene has lived a life of lies with men, and therefore cannot and will not trust a man again.
Remember, once a hooker, always a hooker. It taints their soul, I really do believe that. It’s unfortunate that some of them don’t realize that would be the case when they get involved initially, but bad choices do define some people’s lives. For every Thai girl who tries hooking, there’s an American kid who tries meth. Neither move usually winds up working out well. They’re people and they need to be treated with respect, but you CANNOT BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. Those that lie about their past or present exploits do so out of shame and out of selfishness. They know most guys won’t be interested if they admit it, so of course they’ll like. You need to get to the truth, somehow and some way.
Did I miss anything? Let us know below?